Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
