I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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