I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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