I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
