halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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