The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
