I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
