Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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