people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
