let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
You're like the curious george of whores
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Randomize
