My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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