Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
