Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
