arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
