Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
