haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize