i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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