So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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