2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Best friends brother. Beat that.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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