How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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