my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
