You're so nebulous sometimes
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
