i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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