yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize