he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
