that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
