Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Every concussion has its silver lining
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
