So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
