I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
