Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
