Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Randomize
