He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize
