just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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