i think my mom watched the whole time
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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