South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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