so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
