The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
