Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
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