Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I think im going to throw up on grandma
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
