shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
