i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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