How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
