I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Define "chronic" masturbator.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
why do cheetos always look like penises
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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