My nipple is on Facebook.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
