I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
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