If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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