? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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