More tranny stories later!
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Did I show you my penis last night?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
