Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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