Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Randomize
