yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
