we're blogging at a bar
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize