margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Randomize
